Trust the process...

Let go. Just give it up, seriously.

No, I’m not talking about giving up on the process of getting healthy and being where you want to be, I’m saying let go of everything you think is holding you back. Stop thinking and just fucking do it.

I hit a huge milestone last week. HUGE. Well, for me at least.

I let go.

Last week I had been feeling really down about this whole process. I’m at the point in my progress where I think I hit a wall when in reality it’s just me being afraid of pushing further. I just had a conversation with my mom and she totally called me out on it. I get to this size and start getting more attention…whether it is from guys or even my friends and it freaks me out. I have always been pretty shy and hide away from attention. Being a bigger girl made it easier for me to feel like no one noticed me, that no one cared, and I strangely found comfort in it. I guess when you live your whole life one way it’s hard to imagine how you’d be able to live it any other way.

Well the compliments on my progress started flowing last week and for some reason, it didn’t freak me out! I welcomed it and thrived on it. Saturday night I was approached at the bar more than once and even got asked for my number…I’m 25 and that was literally the first time that’s ever happened. Sad. Haha but for once I felt more excited than scared. All it took was for me to smile and be confident and I think it all stems from the progress I’ve made in the gym. I’m feeling stronger, I’m not dreading workouts anymore (usually) and I haven’t had a workout where I was upset about my lack of effort in a while.

I’m going out this week and buying a smaller pair of pants (or 5). Usually I just let my clothes swim on me and eventually I gain the weight back and they fit again. Not this time. I’m pushing past this point and I’m not going to look back. I’m going to continue to make progress. I’m going to let go of that scale and base my happiness on my actual happiness.

A lot of us in this yearlong assessment are stuck on seeing a certain number when in reality we are making more progress than we think we are. You guys are KILLING WODs, dropping inches and are feeling awesome…focus on that. Trust the process. The results will come. You just have to let go of what’s holding you back; whether it be the number on the scale or the thought of people paying attention to you. You will get there, we will all make sure of it.